Successful Marriage, Successful Children part 3

Number  3 --  never allow a significant  difference to develop in how you  express love or enforce discipline. Now, this is the good cop/bad cop thing.  And this comes into extremes. Your children need both of you to be affectionate with them.  And your children need both of you to discipline them. And sometimes the man, at a certain age, has to be the one that enforces the discipline. Ok, just simply for size or whatever it is. But you both are empowered to discipline, and you both support each other in discipline. But the horrible thing is when one parent  is a goof-off, the other parent has to become more stern in order to bring a balance in a family ( raising children).
When one spouse is out of control, the other spouse will go the opposite extreme to gain control. If you're a spendthrift,  I’m going to rat-hole money. But we're not unified. If you're a goof-off and you're too fun  and you're too permissive with  the kids, then  I’m going to have  to be more stern and be  the disciplinarian. And what  happens is, because now  I’m  the disciplinarian,  I’m not  able to show the affection. You've robbed me of the ability to show the affection that I would show, because now I’ve got to be the disciplinarian. Come together and make this commitment. Children need affection from their mother and father. You don't make the woman the affectionate person or the man the affection person, say, well, you're sweeter than me and you're more affectionate and natural than me, you give kids the affection ( raising children).
Their sexual and emotional development is very, very tied to the affection and attention they get from both sexes. Both sexes. So they both need you to affirm them verbally and be affectionate. And they  both need you to express discipline both in healthy ways as a united front. Don't get into the good cop/bad cop thing. And if you're into that, come together and talk and make that   agreement that says, we're both  going to love these kids and we're  both going to discipline these  kids, because if we don't, we're  going to go to polarities, and our  children become the casualties.  It confuses those children. They need two parents loving each other and getting along ( raising children).

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